It has begun
and I still cannot believe it. Sitting on our first flight from SF to Miami
with Anne taking a nap next to me, I realize this is the first moment of calm
and relaxation I’ve had in weeks. I am starting to relax and see the first
glimpses of excitement on the horizon.
During the last few weeks, the dominating state of mind was one filled
with anxiety, sadness, worry – and not excitement. Everyone I’ve been talking
to has annoyingly asked the same question over and over again: “Are you
excited?” And my answer was always an evasive and polite “Yes.” Catching up with
Anne just now on the plane, she confessed a similar experience, which made me
feel more at ease with my bizarre state of mind.
You see,
when you are rooted in a life somewhere, and you have bills to pay, a job and
tons of ties to the many things that make your life what it is, putting that
life on a shelf while preparing for a new nomad life takes a lot of research
and planning. And for that to work out properly, you need your head on your
shoulders. And for your head to be on your shoulders, you hardly have energy
left for euphoria and excitement. But now that all the stressful planning is
behind, let the excitement begin!
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| Taken over Lima right before landing. November 22, 2011. |
This plane
is now taking me from my current established life to the new nomadic life. On a symbolic level, I see this flight as the
borderline or transporter between the two. It’s also the first moment of
“nothing to do” – what a bliss and strange concept. I am looking forward to
moments like this, of “nothing to do”, and the thrill of dedicating them to
myself, to introspection, reading, writing, taking notes on the things I did,
saw, smelled, tasted, loved, hated and adored during the day. I believe that
introspection, time-to-self, time for reflection and meditation is what my old
life lacked the most. I was too busy with my day-to-day responsibilities and
too tired at night to do anything for myself, to nourish my soul spiritually.
I am excited
to not have a smart phone, to not obsessively check email and Facebook on it
every 30 minutes, to not text like a maniac instead of talking on the phone or
in real life, to not chat with people who live a few blocks away or in the same
house. I am excited to leave technology behind, to not hear people talk about
“checking in on Foursquare,” or about some new iPhone app. That may seem ironic
coming from someone who has worked for a tech company until a few days ago, but
yeah, I think we’re doing the tech thing way too much in San Francisco. We’re
too connected, our lives are too much on display online, we’re too compelled to
post updates about every single mundane detail.
Posted from the Miami International airport at 12:54am local time.
